Sill Growing Up....

 MAN! People really didn't warn me enough about adult life.

First of all, when do you feel like an adult actually. I am well into my 30s and I still feel like a teenager. But a teenager with adult responsibilities. 

I feel like I am unqualified for the things that the world requires me to do, cause I AM a proper adult.

Did I grow up too fast? Was I suppose to gain some superpowers as soon as I was deemed an adult in the eyes of the society.

 But I still don't know how taxes work.

I still have hard time meeting new people.

I still need help with my work and duties.

I still need my mom and dad.

As I still struggle to make it through the daily life of an adult hoping that I am doing what I am supposed to do, which I still don't know what it is exactly, I am slowly becoming older.

I need a time-out. An adult time-out.

My mind needs to catch up to the years I have lived.

I just hope that I don't run out of years as i am trying to ADULT.

fighting the unfair fight

Such a cliche thing to say that life is unfair but, it is undeniably so. It was unfair, it is still unfair and it would be unfair. How do you fight such unfairness? 

I thought everyone including me was capable to fight unfairness however, it was a but a naive thought. I thought if I was honest, I was true and I was good I can battle unfairness and win. 

Sadly, I found out it is not so. 

Some people would always find successful ways to get what they want by extorting someone. And they even get away with it. They are not held accountable for their actions and consequences. 

The loss is only one sided. 

So, the question remains how do you fight unfairness? 

Do you fight unfairness with unfairness?

Or do you wait for redemption and not do anything and suffer the result of their unfair means?

Do people like that even get redemption?

One thing is certain: life is unfair.

veg or not veg

Not gonna lie but i consider it an achievement that I stayed a vegetarian for more than a decade. Looking back to when I started out as a vegetarian, I was not a pure vegetarian. I had a hard time leaving chicken for sometime. It was my favorite but now I dont even eat that. 

But I do eat egg. I know what u though for a sec, she should not call herself a vegetarian if she eats egg. 

That's the issue I realized. When I had forsaken all meat except chicken, they were always quick to point out that I should not call myself vegetarian. They were correct but what irked me even now is how they would treat me. It's like they were telling me u either have to eat all types of meat or cut off everything. The in-between thing was an abomination. 

They were consuming every meat and they dared to question my choice of food. They had that kind of idiotic pride of pointing out MY choice was crazy. That eating every type of meat was better than eating some. 

Everybody is different. You meet every person at some point of their lives and when u find a person on a path to doing something good, be sure to encourage them instead of pointing useless mistake to make urself feel better. 

That child was me

It wasn’t that same place. Heck, it wasn’t the same Dzongkhag. Still, there I was staring at a scene that was nostalgic to the point that I could feel that evening breeze on my face. Slowly, as I delved more in that scenario I stepped down and sat. Children’s laughter, inhibited and eternal echoed through my very being. I could almost see those diamond like lights shinning against the inky blue sky. My friends chasing me and I, laughing and bristling with excitement. I knew no place was more beautiful or happy than there and now. Those smiles could spark hopes, happiness and energy. It gave and it received. Gazing at those same smiles I see right now it’s so hard to believe; that child was me.

An institution belongs to the students too.

                                              An institution belongs to the students too.
                       honestly i was so happy that i was going back to college after already using my golden card to experience college. those precious and memorable time i've spent in class, campus and friend's dorm. i couldn't believe that i was going have the chance to do it again. its like i discovered a time machine and i've picked the part of my life i enjoyed the most. But, (that hated word 'but') the college was competently different and i was disheartened. From the beginning i got the impression that this college was not for the students but a playground for adults where they use us as puppets for their own gain. firstly during the orientation they listed down the rules; that wasn't the the problem the problem was when they stated and i remember it clearly cause it was the first day, "If you think you can't do it, you are welcome to leave." i was disheartened that such an institution which is the most vital part of the education of our country would just tell us to leave. they didnt care if we succeed or learnt anything but they didnt want to bother. the time and effort i had spent to get in that college just crumbled away from those few words. i was an idiot but those words stuck to me and the impression of the college got worse.
they had rules and it was more directed to the female population. while most of us were already matured with our families at home we were treated like middle school children where we were unable to think for ourselves. telling the girls that we were not allowed to wear shorts when the temperature is always at an average of 30 degree Celsius is wrong and plain stupid. teaching the younger girls that they should hide their body and be ashamed of having a female body is a patriarchal  imposition that can be termed "archaic" at best. the younger boys seems so eager to tell us what not to wear, thus, giving the message that boys will always be superior to girls. the college lacks understanding in equity.
a student should also know how to be a civilized person and should respect the environment. with this good thinking the students are made to work more than 3 hours in the hot blazing sun every Saturday. if you think that is too little then we also work during our 'club' time. they could have just named it SUPW instead of club. if you still think that is a small amount of time to be toiling in the school campus planting Doma then we also wake u 6:30 AM in the morning twice a week so that our hostels will be so clean that you can lick the floors off along with the cockroaches. On Wednesday you wake up at 6 and after your hostel is clean then you go off to your classes and on Saturday  you go off to campus SUPW and just like a robot you are expected to do everything they order you to do which is pasted on the notice board. sometimes, you can do SUPWs in Sunday. oh how thoughtful our college is.
What a wonderful college they want us,the students to buy everything thats why they have used low-quality plastic taps that look like it was made to be played by small children. and if you feel hot please feel free to go to the computer lab where all the ACs are unpulgged and stored for College's Golden Jubliee inaguration. Have a presentation in class you will be accompanied by the lovely music of the construction that just happens to be in progress just outside you classroom.
i know i sound like a spoiled brat who complains a lot and i have complained a lot. that's why i am using this page to say everything for the last time and just shut up cause thats what our society has taught us and apparently it is still taught in our college, to just nod and say yes sir and yes mam.
i hope that a day comes when people realise that an institution/college is a place from where we learn most academically and socially. When we are at that age and surrounded by friends at lease dont be so eager to show the dark side of the world. its a small and precious place that we want to treasure before we are bombarded by job, stress, families and money. For a moment considers the thought that the college is also a place for the students.
Thank you for listening to my rant.



                   

Death: a crime.

The first time I felt death in my hands...it was not the slow delicat death of a flower...or the dry dust of the wood...
It was cruel..it was greedy...like a hunter waiting for the deer...devouring everything life was...the light, the beat, the songs.
The body went cold and everything stopped...everything stood still...death won against time too.
The perfect crime.

Thank you 2015

Year 2015
Damn what a year it was...so many things happened...i fell in love and so my heart got broken but included lots of joys n memories. Hahah my heart got broken but it has such beautiful cracks n scars...i say it was worth it...those cracks n scars have their own beautiful story to tell so...i smile n thank god that it happened...it was an unexpected n new beginning but as the painful goodbye dissappears from the horizon i know even more unexepcted and wonderful beginnnings r waiting for me. I had the best job with the most awesome team...my incredible collegues...those were my hardest goodbyes n my saddest tears. I love u guys...i worked hard n played hard and my great friends were with me through everything...through celebrations n for misreable times...thank u guys for always beinng there to remind me that i got miracles in my life...my friends...i broke i got up and i grew...i stood tall at the end of the year and i will keep standing to face 2016...i have no fears because i know i am me more than ever...i know myself better n even luckier i know who has my back...to all those lovely people...thank u for being there...u saved my life a million times...wishing that 2016 will even be more awesome with u guys. Its a bit late but lets make 2016 a year to remember.